Two Drops Of Water
Direct Answers - Column for the week of June 17, 2002
My problem is that I am falling in love. My friend and I are both 23. He lives in the United States, seven hours away from where I live in Canada. Just yesterday I came back from seeing him again.
I always have such a wonderful time, but this time on the trip home I started missing him as if a part of myself was also missing. It was such a sad and empty feeling I wished I didn't have to come home.
We share romantic feelings, and when we are together, those feelings are expressed in displays of affection and acts of kindness. We hold hands and kiss, he pays for my meals and takes the day off work to drive me around.
The boundaries between friends and more than friends have blurred between us, and now as I get to know him more, I find I am becoming involved deeper and deeper.
We are both aware we care for each other, but I have not told him how intense my feelings have become. We have differences, distance and religion. Before he met me, the religious aspect ended a relationship because they were unable to agree how to raise a family.
With myself religion is not an issue. I would be okay raising children in another religion. I want to express what I feel, but I do not know how to talk to him without scaring him. I am afraid of the vulnerability which comes with this. I do not want to get hurt, but even more, I do not want to miss the opportunity to be with him.
Petula, I once loved a woman with whom I had a mostly business relationship, but I was moving away permanently. Still, I couldn't leave without telling her I loved her, and a little speech rehearsed itself in my mind, almost against my will.
When I went to see her for the last time, she was busy and asked me to step into another room and help myself to coffee. On a table was a letter telling of her love for me. That woman was Tamara. We met in an embrace and have been together ever since.
With the greatest risk comes the greatest reward. One of the most important lessons of life is learning not to let fear ruin our chances for happiness. If you share your feelings and they aren't reciprocated, you will be devastated. For a while. But you will also be closer to finding the person with whom you can share love for a lifetime.
I went abroad for a year and dated a man a few years my senior. The man I met is Irish, like myself.
I miss him terribly and keep telling him this on the phone, which seems to be really annoying him. I try my best not to, but I can't help myself. He recently sent a present for my birthday. He sent the receipt also, and without thinking I gave out about it.
What I said came out completely wrong. I apologized, but he stopped ringing me completely. I know pressuring wasn't helping, but I just love to hear from him. I've been a jealous person for as long as I remember.
He told me his former girlfriend was the prettiest girl in the county. He left her because she did the dirt on him, but that made me uneasy as well. Could you please help? I love him to bits and don't want to lose him.
Erin, the essence of jealousy is "it's mine." The essence of love is "it is meant to be." Your pursuit is pushing this man away. Stop chasing him. If he comes back, remember a person is not a possession. Love is the glue in a relationship. When it is gone, so is the relationship.
About The Author
Authors and columnists Wayne and Tamara Mitchell can be reached at www.WayneAndTamara.com.
Send letters to: Direct Answers, PO Box 964, Springfield, MO 65801 or email: DirectAnswers@WayneAndTamara.com.
What Inspires You?
Have you ever thought? What inspires YOU? What is it that drives you day in and day out? What is it that inspires you?
Remember when you were really young? It was an era of inconsequential innocence. Even at this age, your imagination was larger than large. Seemingly effortlessly, you concocted boldacious thoughts and dreams. You could pretty much imagine and then do anything you set out to do.
The Tiniest of Gladiators
I stared into those biggest of navy blue eyes and felt the power ofhis fighting spirit, despite the pain and week long raging fever. Mostof the time my heart was in my throat and my mind was awash withcounter-productive thoughts like, "why him?" and "this isn't fair!"
Your World Your Way - Trusting Yourself In Business
"It doesn't interest me who you are, or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the centre of the fire with me and not shrink back."
The Information Age
Direct Answers - Column for the week of December 1, 2003
Blessings and Art of Living
My perception is that universe infinitely blesses us every moment. Why we do not acknowledge is that we are not consciously aware of it. For example you start in the morning to the office, the breeze that touches your body; the surrounding climate, the ambience of office etc are all the ways that universe conspires to bless. What we need on our part is to simply be conscious of it and the doors for infinite blessing of the universe opens. Simple things have enormous capacity to bless us, heal us but we not open to the vast in and around us and get caught in our own hypnotized worlds. What opens the blessings is awareness. Hold loose of yourself from your self created reality and simply be aware of every little thing that you come across.
Order and Law
When disorder comes into our lives, we obviously aren't paying any attention to God's laws for us. You may think the 10 Commandments are not for today, but think again. When God gave these commandments to Moses He never intended that they would go out of style. God is the same today, yesterday and tomorrow. Once God says something, it becomes law.
Charge Your Imagination (3)
As we progress into the year, it is necessary for professionals to really put their Imagination to work as they plot strategies for business excellence this year. To help them do a good job, IMAGINATION (as a person) started an inspirational message on Vision 2030. Here is the conclusion of the message.
What Footsie Taught Us!
We have just inherited a rag, tag and bobtail of a dog called 'Footsie'. She was found three weeks ago wandering around outside a local restaurant for a couple of days looking for food. Paula, a woman who takes responsibility for stray animals in this part of the island, took her in and started to look after her. She soon found that, Footsie has such a quiet, loving nature but is definitely not a 'looker'. She wouldn't win any awards at Crufts. Pure white coat, almost albino type eyes but a protruding bottom set of teeth which means she always has the canine tooth on the left and several of her other teeth showing. But, as we said, a lovely temperament. Very playful, loving and peaceful.
Everyone Has Been Hurt...Part 2
Extreme Self Care
EXTREME is not a term usually connected to self-care. Self-care usually portrays a picture of gentleness, kindness, loving self or being nurturing. People don't consider it necessary to take extreme action when it comes to self-care. Why?
A Global Empathy Deficit- 2 Lessons
"...We've got a budget deficit that's important, we've got a trade deficit that's critical, but what I worry most is our empathy deficit." ? Interview in O Magazine with Barack Obama.
Do You Feel Headed For Shipwreck?
The ocean liner Achille Lauro sailed perpetually under a dark cloud. In 1953 it collided with another ship. In 1975 it rammed a Lebanese vessel, killing four people. In 1981 it suffered a fire that claimed two lives. In 1985, Palestinian terrorists grabbed world headlines by seizing the ship, slaying passenger Leon Klinghoffer, and dumping him and his wheelchair overboard. In December of 1994, off Somalia, a fire broke out in the engine room, forcing all 1,000 aboard to abandon ship. Two days later, the Achille Lauro sank to the bottom of the Indian Ocean.
Call To Action
Direct Answers - Column for the week of February 3, 2003
Who Is Dr Robert Anthony and Why Is He One of My Mentors and Heroes?
So who is Dr Robert Anthony?
Anam Chara - Wishing Versus Wanting
There is an old saying, which warns, "be careful for what you wish because you may get what you want."
Trust Yourself ? The Hero?s Way!
Buying a VCR may not seem like a noteworthy purchase in a high-tech world yet it proved to be a worthy blessing offering much learning. Boxes filled with VHS recordings were unearthed from dark recesses where they had hidden for over a decade.
No More Frustration: The Thorns of Opportunity - Part II
The quest for the ultimate victory.
An Unquenched Thirst
Direct Answers - Column for the week of September 9, 2002
Do We Really Want to Be There Yet
The beauty in creation is in the process, in every single step along the way.
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