Direct Answers - Column for the week of March 31, 2003
I don't drive and have health problems. I have a friend who runs an under-the-table errand service. She is one of my closest friends so I rely on her. I always give her sufficient money for her time, and she has helped me out in many situations.
There have been two times in a row where she has blown me off. Both times she was to take me to a doctor appointment. The first time she did not call me in advance as she always did, so I called her. She said, "I can't talk, I'm running out the door." She hung up before I got to say a word. She called me back at midnight and said she was really sorry, she forgot.
I thought she probably did and went on with my business, though she ruined my plans and I ended up in a jam because of it. Last week I had a very important doctor's appointment. I called her well in advance, and she confirmed it twice during the week. But the time came when she was supposed to call and pick me up, and she never called.
So I called her. There was no answer. Today she basically blamed the whole thing on me, saying, "I was home sitting around waiting for your call. I don't understand why you didn't get through."
The long and the short of it is I don't know if I am being na´ve, or is this just two strange coincidences. I don't want to accuse her of anything, but assessing the situation, I wonder if she doesn't want to do it and won't tell me directly. That would not offend me. I would make other arrangements. What do you think?
Zeta, some years ago two basketball teams from the state of Ohio were contending for the national championship. The fans from Ohio State thought their team was better than the University of Cincinnati, and they were shocked when the other school won the national basketball title.
For a year the Ohio State fans claimed it was a fluke that Cincinnati won. But guess what? The next year the University of Cincinnati won again. That inspired some Cincinnati fans to rent a billboard near the Ohio State campus. The message on the billboard read, "Well, what do you know? Two flukes in a row!"
Why would you expect up-front behavior from someone working under the table? It's time to make other arrangements. Two flukes in a row are a message.
If a woman has not found her soul mate by age 30, she might as well give up! It is all very nice to talk about "not giving up early" as you do, when you are in a strong, loving, and respectful marriage.
Men have it easier. Men's idea of marriage is to have someone to abuse. They find a sweet, nice, gentle girl like I once was and expect her to just take it. Women are supposed to be so grateful some man, any man, would have them.
God does not in reality care about those of us who are heartsick.
Yvette, for most people the good things in life don't happen until later. Our local newspaper publishes the age of people applying for marriage licenses. In today's paper, more than 60 percent of both the men and the women are over 30.
Tennyson wrote, "How dull it is to pause, to make an end, to rust unburnished, not to shine in use!" The aim of life, he said, is "to strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield."
Most of our problems come from the six inches between our ears. Once you believe something is true, it is true. For you. Paradoxically, we cannot change until we believe we can, and once we've changed, we won't need belief. We know it is true.
About The Author
Authors and columnists Wayne and Tamara Mitchell can be reached at www.WayneAndTamara.com.
Send letters to: Direct Answers, PO Box 964, Springfield, MO 65801 or email: DirectAnswers@WayneAndTamara.com.
Abused as a Child
Child abuse is a much more common event, than is usually expressed in public. I recently attended an event, where people were asked to discuss their darkest secrets. Out of the thirty or so women in the room, nearly two thirds expressed their darkest secret as, being about child abuse and two had had terminations, created by a family member.
The Seasons of Life, Part 1 of 5
Life is about constant, predictable patterns of change. For the six thousand years of recorded history, as humans have entered this world, received parental instruction, classroom instruction, and gathered the experience of life; many have set for themselves ambitious goals, and dreamed lofty dreams.
Facing the Enemies Within
We are not born with courage, but neither are we born with fear. Maybe some of our fears are brought on by your own experiences, by what someone has told you, by what you've read in the papers. Some fears are valid, like walking alone in a bad part of town at two o'clock in the morning. But once you learn to avoid that situation, you won't need to live in fear of it.
Relax. Its Just Your Life
What am I supposed to do with my life? Shouldn't I be doing something...well...more?
A Plausible Defense
Direct Answers - Column for the week of August 5, 2002
The Nature of Anger
Excerpt From The Relationship Handbook: How to Understand and Improve Every Relationship in Your Life by Kevin B. Burk
The Power Of Love In Your Life!
CELEBRATE YOUR LIFE!
5 Notions That Americans Should Put Out To Pasture
Wisdom and knowledge come from the same family but are as different as apples and watermelons. What we call common wisdom is what made you expect me to say oranges instead of watermelons. Common wisdom flows off the tongue like water over the falls but doesn't always require that the brain be fully engaged. Some people call this, the common wisdom of the day. This particular kind of wisdom is rarely examined for truth or any other useful quality. It is commonly accepted because it is so commonly heard. It is much like an unpaid commercial that we set into motion not knowing where it came from and with little regard to whether it is true or not. It is like an old pal who always steps in to keep a conversation going when we run low on original ideas. It is almost never questioned and in most conversation, it is only a matter of who is going to say it first. Some of these sayings so glibly passed around among us are innocuous, while others are outright misleading and sometimes dangerous. Here are five of them that should be challenged, examined, analyzed and if reason prevails, will finally be put out to pasture.
Create 10 Delightful Daily Habits
Practising extreme self-care in our life involves practising good "daily" habits.Daily habits involve more than just exercising and eating right. They include all the things that bring us enjoyment and delight.
A Word Fitly Spoken ~ Acceptance
A WORD FITLY SPOKEN
Lessons Learned Hard
Many of us seek consolation in the words of Frank Sinatra, "I did it my way." I say many of us because I feel this trap has snared more than just me. Oh, it is a trap, alright, a way to defend our defiance, combat accountability, and excuse our own stupidity.
Playing With Fire
Direct Answers - Column for the week of October 21, 2002
I'm writing to you with a completely shattered heart. I've known my wife for over five years, and we got married last August. It was a fairy tale wedding, everything we always wanted, with about 200 guests. Everyone said by the look on our faces they knew we were in love.
A second on your lips forever on your hips never happens with virtual chocolate.
Exceptions To The Rule
Yesterday I turned 48, and she just turned 21. Uh-oh, I can hear the gears turning in your heads already.
Lance Armstrong an Inspiration
Lance Armstrong has already proven he is the greatest athlete ever in the present period. Many ask what drives a man to press on, where does such strength of character come from. How can so much dedication and commitment cause a man to persevere in all aspects of their life? Lance Armstrong is an inspiration to what we all as humans have in common. The level of human intent in our species is well documented and something every one of us possesses.
Direct Answers - Column for the week of May 12, 2003
How to Pray on Water! Announcing Life-Changing Bible Code - Discover Amazing Water Scriptures!
Water is the source of life, yet so few of us understand how to navigate its spiritual and inspirational powers.
Supercharge Your Dreams!
We all accept the fact that the lighter the backpack, the easier and quicker the climb to the top of the mountain. We all understand that the lighter the load on an airplane, the higher and faster it can fly. We pay extra for high octane fuel so our car will operate more efficiently. Then why don't we apply the same wisdom to our bodies and our dreams?
There Must Be More To Life Than This
If you suffer from a nagging feeling of "there must be more to life than this", you're not alone.
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