When Self-Growth becomes Self-Sabotage
Many of us invest quality time and energy into our personal development. We buy inspiring books, sometimes with the workbooks or journals that complement them. We discuss psychology with our friends ? or we look for friends with whom we can have open discussions on the subject. There is activity in our mind ? at times a little bit of confusion. We encounter so many different lines of thoughts, so many tools, so many exploratory exercises we can do. It's as if we were in the middle of a dense, majestic forest?
Then, maybe it happened to you, you reach a point where you don't feel satiated anymore after reading the hot new self-improvement book?The workshop just feels like another workshop? Philosophical discussions feel more like empty calories?It's not that your head is full: it's more that you are hungry. You are hungry, because you have tasted - sometimes chewed ? the wisdom you have read or heard, but you haven't digested and integrated it. Don't we benefit from relaxing and taking a break after a good meal?
I think none of us have ever seen, written in the back of a book, "You don't need to read me ? all the wisdom is within you". No publisher would be so open-minded (or masochist)? Besides, we are the ones who have to figure out for ourselves how we can best use the resources available to us ? how we can use them to connect to our own inner wisdom, inspirations, intuitions. Other people's insights are guiding lights. We don't need a zillion guiding lights, in fact we get lost if we are surrounded by too many of them ? they point in too many different directions. Their role is simply to show us possibilities, which we can consider? and once we have chosen something to be our truth, we close the book, we turn the light off, and we get in touch with our own inner guidance.
One simple concept can drastically change our life. It can be, "Love yourself ", it can be, "Be all that you can be", or "Fear is an illusion"... But none of these makes real sense, no concept will truly transform our life, if it's not integrated in every cell of our body, if it doesn't feel as tangible as if it came from us in the first place. We keep reading and listening to "teachers", and "experts"; but who's the best expert, when it comes to you, or when it comes to me?
I believe nothing in self-growth has to be hard and complex. You can sit in silence, you can look inside yourself with wide open eyes, and you will "see", or feel, the precise wisdom you need at that exact moment. It's not always exactly what we want to hear ? in fact, often it's not, so we refuse to accept it ? but sometimes that's what self-growth is about, that's what we really need to bring ourselves to the next level. That being said, it's easier sometimes to face a book, or another person, than it is to truly face and accept ourselves. And let's acknowledge the fact that we often prefer complicated answers, and techniques.
"Self-sabotage" is a strong word? What I tried to convey with the provoking title is that, at some point, the energy we dedicate to self-growth resources may better serve us (in terms of self-growth) if we invest it elsewhere: in introspection? in basic down-to-earth actions? in meditations? or maybe in fun things?
Sometimes we have an endless to-do list that causes us major stress, and instead of simply doing what must be done, we will read a book on relaxation, do yoga, or else? Sometimes we are a little gloomy, we just need to loosen up, laugh, and have fun? but we will attend a workshop on a subject we think will provide us answers. Not that it won't! Obviously, none of this is "bad" ? sometimes it may even be the most constructive things to do? but what I'm highlight here is that sometimes, it's may not. Finally, I guess my point is: "self-growth can be everything, you have access within yourself to all the wisdom there is, and you are magnificent beyond what you can imagine".
About The Author
Marie-Pier Charron is founder of Implosions, and editor of a monthly newsletter filled with practical tips and empowering strategies. To get your own free subscription, visit her at http://www.implosions.net
Problem Solving: The Easy Way To Solve Problems In Life
Life is full of problems.
Direct Answers - Column for the week of October 6, 2003
Lessons Learned Hard
Many of us seek consolation in the words of Frank Sinatra, "I did it my way." I say many of us because I feel this trap has snared more than just me. Oh, it is a trap, alright, a way to defend our defiance, combat accountability, and excuse our own stupidity.
Direct Answers - Column for the week of April 19, 2004
Spiritual Evolution: A Journey of Truth
BORN OF BODY AND SPIRIT
TIES that BIND
I have no idea how it started or who launched it. Nevertheless years after all of the women in my family died (they were the initiators of all of our major family events and thingamajigs). After the demise of these women our family unit was left largely comprised of men). In recent years, I started paying attention to remarks that I'd heard growing up and today continually heard from other family members about how our family is considerably dissimilar or substantially distant from each other and how we were markedly contrasted from that of other families. As a young adult, I sold into that inconsistency and I eventually started to believe it. Now, from top to bottom I fervently want to know how this mis-perception spawned. I had to see for myself if this "assumption" holds water.
Its About That Time
As we've reached the half way point of the year I'm thinking this might be a good time to pull up and evaluate things. Look back over the first 6 months, and look ahead to the upcoming days and months. Get some clarity. You know?
The Great Challenge of Life
Here's the great challenge of life - You can have more than you've got because you can become more than you are.
How to Overcome Loneliness
Nowadays the majority of people live in very large cities. It is hard to imagine that in cities of millions of people that anyone could feel lonely. However, it is because of the huge size of the cities that we do feel this way. Twenty years ago, you probably knew everyone who lived in your street, at least by sight. Now you are lucky if you know your next-door neighbors.
Moment of Grace
The bedrock of the Christian faith is the good news about God's love. Christian teachings about who we are and about our relationship with our Lord and each other is rooted in the fact that God is love and that He loves His creatures. "And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him." 1 John 4:16.
Personal Fear of Change and How to Change It!
It's interesting how we intellectually know that tomorrow will be different from yesterday, or even different from today. We know this based on experience. Wasn't it only yesterday computers started appearing on people's office desks? And now today, some of those people who cursed the wretched new things, rage when theirs or anyone else's computer is down! Tomorrow will not be the same as yesterday. We know it. And yet, many of us go through change and feel battle fatigue, look worn out, whine loudly.
Ctrl-Alt-Delete Your Life
Ah, the good old "Vulcan nerve pinch", the three-fingered salute, the one-handed solution to many backhanded aggravations. How simple, how effective, how instantaneously gratifying to the mind behind the mouse. Wouldn't it be great if we could take the lessons learned from this simple three-point process into our lives and install them into our own hotkey set-up to help us deal with life's little blue screens of death? Well, we can, provided we are willing to use a little creativity, allow ourselves some literary leeway and don't mind stretching an already strained metaphor until it squeals for mercy. Shall we begin?
The Art of Letting Go
It has been six months since I left the corporate world ? and there are some things I will always miss. Like saying good morning to colleagues on my way to the office where I worked every day. Or getting caught in the excitement as we prepared for another big meeting or presentation.
Are You Taking Responsibility?
It is time to take responsibility for our actions and the results we create in our lives. It's time to stop expecting someone else to do for us what we are unwilling to do for ourselves. It's time to remember that no one is doing it to us and no one is going to do it for us.
Self Acceptance ? Lessons From My Hair Affair
For our diet and, indeed, in every aspect of our lives, we must remember to relax from the demands of the unrealistic ideal. For those trying to lose weight, you cannot be the Barbie. For those lifting weights, you cannot be the Governor of California. Accepting this principle first, can give you the peace of mind to love what you do have, lower frustration, and actually make weight loss easier in the long run!
Do You Feel Headed For Shipwreck?
The ocean liner Achille Lauro sailed perpetually under a dark cloud. In 1953 it collided with another ship. In 1975 it rammed a Lebanese vessel, killing four people. In 1981 it suffered a fire that claimed two lives. In 1985, Palestinian terrorists grabbed world headlines by seizing the ship, slaying passenger Leon Klinghoffer, and dumping him and his wheelchair overboard. In December of 1994, off Somalia, a fire broke out in the engine room, forcing all 1,000 aboard to abandon ship. Two days later, the Achille Lauro sank to the bottom of the Indian Ocean.
Direct Answers - Column for the week of June 30, 2003
Energy Work Basics Part 3: The Power of High Intention
At SPIRIT Connections, we believe that the most powerful tool we have when working with energy is our ability to set a high intention. We add the word "high" to intention since we are interested in intentions with a high vibration.
Need for a Belief System: A System of Organization for Your Experiences!
I've spoken with many people who, over time, have felt inundated by their lives. It seems as though they've accumulated all of these memories and experiences, but the information seems jumbled and overwhelming. This pile of 'mind junk' keeps getting in their way whenever they attempt to move forward in life. It's as if they feel that they have to deal with each and every disassociated memory lying on the floor of their brains.
Self-Validation: Living an Empowered Life
Sometimes we are concerned with being right and we don't stop to think that our comments or our actions might hurt another person's feelings.
|© Athifea Distribution LLC - 2013|