How Healing The Past Empowers Your Future
Everyday I meet people who have a chronic upset that runs their lives, and I notice that they are not even aware of it. Often the pain has become buried in their unconscious; or if they are aware of it, they choose to deny any power to combat it.
Yet unless they seek healing, this energy locked up in their mind is a continual drain on their vitality. It is a parasite to their life-force.
The first step to true self-help is willing to be candid, notice what hurts, and find the therapy that is necessary to remove the psychic burden.
Those who do this will find that their whole life will open up. All the things that seemed impossible before suddenly become possible. They realize that they need not be amongst the walking wounded because help is near at hand. All they have to do is ask for it.
Most people deny or push back the events that hurt them, and when they do this, they choose the path of disempowerment.
They are burdened not by what actually happened, but by how they cling to their story of persecution. If it has been awful enough, they even numb out and blank out the persecution.
Their persecutor has indeed won over them; not only then, but also in the now. Their persecutor's malice not only disempowered them in the past, but continues to weaken them.
Often victims think that revenge is a desirable option and they feel that they might draw some satisfaction if they could strike out and hurt as they have been hurt, but often the persecutor is no longer available, and sometimes may even have died a long time ago.
Child-molestors, spousal abusers, terrorists and criminals rank among those who seek revenge, but because the persecutor is no longer available, they act out their rage on others who had nothing to do with their abuse.
Almost everybody has been tormented at one time or another. Those who are psychologically healthy have taken the effort to seek and find healing.
In your case, the cycle of your unhappiness can only stop when you decide that it is time to get your power back Until you make this decision, you will forever be persecuted, because your wounded psyche will continue to do your tormentors work.
Hell, in fact, is never letting the wound heal, but opening it up afresh when thought of your torment comes to mind. And a deeper hell is not even allowing the pain to reach consciousness but express itself through tormented behavior.
How do you let it go? That is the task of skilled therapy.
All psychological imbalances, whether mild, as in a neurosis, or chronic, as in a full blown psychosis, arise from embracing victimhood.
Unless a time comes when you confront your inner tormentors, no self-help course of study can help you "unleash the giant within."
Knowledge is not enough; emotional catharis is a necessity. Even this article can do nothing for you; it is what you do with it that makes a difference. Do you confront your past, and find a healer? Or do you live with it, and continue along the paths of least promise? We are always choosing, even when we choose not to choose.
Saleem Rana got his masters in psychotherapy from California Lutheran University, Thousand Oaks, Ca., 15 years ago and now resides in Denver, Colorado. His articles on the internet have inspired over ten thousand people from around the world. Discover how to create a remarkable life
Copyright 2005 Saleem Rana. Please feel free to pass thisarticle on to your friends, or use it in your ezine ornewsletter. It's a shareware article.
I tremble at the thought that millions of people suffer enough to entertain a death wish. Perhaps it is as common a component of the psyche as suffering is a widespread phenomenon among humans. I suppose it is normally counterbalanced by the appetite for life, which joy and hope can whet, but is it ever overturned? Probably not, at least not for long, and that worries me. Could numerous instances of big-risk-taking be death-wish-related? Overeating, smoking, speeding, every human deed that is potentially lethal, including war, may be symptomatic of a death wish, all the more pernicious as it is usually denied or concealed behind other motives.
Faith Like a Child
Taking Life Head On
"We are built to conquer environment, solve problems, achieve goals and we find no real satisfaction or happiness in life without obstacles to conquer and goals to achieve." - Maxwell Maltz in Psycho-Cybernetics (1960)
How to Use the Ebb and Flow of Life to Your Advantage
Are you overwhelmed with so many activities you don't know where to start?
Change Begins With Choice
Any day we wish we can discipline ourselves to change it all. Any day we wish; we can open the book that will open our mind to new knowledge. Any day we wish; we can start a new activity. Any day we wish; we can start the process of life change. We can do it immediately, or next week, or next month, or next year.
Taking the Leap of Faith
So often we stop and look at our lives and say silently within, "What am I doing here? What is this life I have chosen and is it all that I wished for?" " Am I living my purpose? Is this what I really intended to achieve in this life experience?"
Just a Typical Teenage Boy
Judge not, lest ye be judged. ?Matthew 7:1
Pay It Forward
My friend Hugh Jeffries died. He was a wealthy man. His wealth was of the kind that you can take with you when you go. I do not know what his tangible estate measures. That is unimportant now. This I do know?his contributions to the lives of others were the true measure of his success and wealth.
Care And Maintenance Of The Human Hard Drive
The human brain is very much like a hard drive. If you stop to think of it, they are both filled with billions of tiny bits of information, stored in the memory cells just waiting to be accessed. They both use electrical energy to find those bits and put them together to recreate something that we have placed there. They work on demand, and we expect them to instantly give us what we want.
A Bit Of Turbulence
Direct Answers - Column for the week of July 1, 2002
The Bright Side of Loneliness
Recently a romantic relationship came to an end and I found myself alone again. The minutes, the hours now felt empty. For three weeks I sat beside a silent phone, rehashing the past and coming to terms with my loss. After the warmth and intimacy of love, my loneliness felt like a great abyss that I could not escape.
It's funny how an acquaintance from the past just pops into your head sometimes. Usually the flashback is brought on by a phrase someone says, or a thought you have. Today my particular flashback was induced by the words "this guy," which were uttered by one of the custodians where I work, as we passed in the hall.
To Raise Your Frequency, Just Turn on the Joy!
The feeling response to being filled up with Love from your Spirit is joy. Higher frequency energy-Love-activates a joy response in your emotional body. I like to say that joy is a frequency-but it is more accurate to say that joy is your emotional response to higher frequency. When you are at a certain frequency, feeling the Love from Spirit moving through you to Spirit, the natural feeling you have is joy. And here is something truly empowering to know: when you feel joy, you are at a higher frequency.
$12 And 90 Minutes To Change Your Life
Have you ever listened to self hypnosis tapes? Or listened repeatedly to certain music that carried a specific message? Or what about, have you attended weekly services within a specific religious venue?
The Priceless Gift of a Knee-High Smile
She was just over knee-high standing next to me in the checkout line. I first saw her eyeing a display of candy as she followed her mother and brothers through the store.
The Finer, and Finest, Things in Life
In America, we have a saying: The finer things in life. These are the things that most people talk about when they are speaking of thing of high quality. In fact, much of that which propels people to pursue success, particularly financial success, is the desire to participate in the finer things in life.
The Brilliant You, Unreleased!
You're a remarkable person. But, you knew that already. Still, buried among apathy, unbelief and inhibition, is the brilliant "you" waiting to be released. You already knew that, too. A few disappointments here, several temporary defeats there, and POOF! just like that, you settled for being a risk-conscious, opportunity: self-denied, generality. Nobody makes any progress by standing still. You're not an exception; and you're not alone.
Its A Brand New Day
Waking up one day and realizing your world just isn't working for you is the first step into an incredibly exciting new journey. That awakening is to be the first of many. Maybe you've been reading self improvement books and feeling like something is missing. That's a sure sign your life may be changing, especially if you are beginning to question your own spirit.
Ignorance and Fantasy
Are beliefs not often the children of ignorance and fantasy? Consider the heavenly view of the world that young souls entertain at the height of their innocence, when their youth has been surrounded by love and filled with happiness. Hear their laughter. Dreams expand in a vacuity of knowledge like a laughing gas and induce the blindest, the purest joy. Ignorance is bliss, as they say, because it spares us the mental restraints associated with knowledge (which reveals the limits of reality and hence the impossibility of our fantasies). It is the ultimate playground where the mind can build castles in the air, create a wonderland, and live delightedly in this kingdom of reverie. It paves the way for the reign of error, as it leaves us to believe whatever we like. Everything that is desirable is realizable, if not real, until we find evidence to the contrary. Santa Claus eventually dies of our old age ? when we are no longer so young, so green, that we are easily fooled by a tall story.
Direct Answers - Column for the week of August 26, 2002
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