Stress Management and Mastery: How to Learn from Mistakes
Q. I've been told that I need to learn from my mistakes. But telling me to learn from my mistakes is easier said than done. How exactly does it happen?
A. People seem to go through three stages in learning how to learn from their mistakes:
Stage One: Get me out of this!
No one likes mistakes or the problems and challenges that accompany them. But each mistake, problem and challenge comes with a gift for us.
When we are rescued from our mistakes, we miss out on what we are to learn from them. There are certain lessons that each of us is to learn in life. If we don't learn the lesson the first time around, the same mistakes, problems and challenges will come back around.
I call this the "taps and 2-by-4's process of life." When we need to learn and/or change something, life begins with a small tap on our shoulder. If we don't pay attention, the taps get more forceful. If we still don't listen, life has a way of taking out a 2-by-4 and whacking us across the head to get our attention.
Having been on the receiving end of a few 2-by-4's, I recommend that you pay attention to the taps, because 2-by-4's hurt.
Stage Two: Get me through this
Instead of looking for a way out, you are looking for a way through. We begin to ask questions like "How can I get through this?" instead of "How can I get out of this?" The focus is on survival instead of escape.
The only problem is that while surviving sounds good, it's not very compelling. How excited would you be each morning if you got up thinking, "All right, I get to go survive today"?
Sometimes it seems like the very best we can do is survive a situation, but I believe there are better responses we can choose. In the words of Dan Fogelberg: "Lessons learned are like bridges burned, we only need to cross them but once."
Stage Three: What can I learn from this?
This is when you begin to learn from mistakes. If you believe that all mistakes come with hidden gifts, then this is when you can begin to discover them. Just asking the question frames the situation in a different perspective.
Here are some useful questions to ask: What was I trying to accomplish? Did it work? What ongoing themes were revealed that need to be changed? How many other ways are there to accomplish what I want? Is what I want to accomplish the right thing to do? Is it worth doing? What will happen if I keep making this mistake and/or don't learn anything from this problem?
Making a mistake is not the biggest mistake we can make; not learning from them is the biggest mistake.
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Easy Elimination Of Worry & Stress!
It is very true that, unfortunately, many people look to reduce feelings of worry and stress by doing the very things that, ultimately, bring on more of the same. Alcohol, drugs, and over indulgence in the wrong types of food all seem to offer an immediate solution to get away from the stresses of the day.
Stress Management: Declare Your Freedom To........................
1) Create the life you desire
Relieve Anxiety with Hypnosis
There are two types of anxiety:
Beating Middle of the Night Stress
What do you do when you wake up in the middle of the night and cannot go back to sleep? Do you lie there tossing, stretch, panic, and feel your heart thumping? Do you notice your own shallow breathing? Do you try futilely to follow the random speeding thoughts that race through your mind?
A 2-Minute Stress Buster
Meditation seems to have arrived in the mainstream of late, and for good reasons. As reported in a 2004 issue of Time Magazine -- brain imaging shows that meditation actually shifts your brain's activity from the right side of your brain, over to the left side.
How to Relieve Stress
One question that is not asked enough by people under stress is how to relieve stress. Unfortunately, people who are under stress tend to simply take it as a matter of course and simply accept its existence as though it was some sort of natural occurrence, or even a boon! Thus, people who are feeling the effects of stress do not actually take the time to notice that they are under stress and need relief. And when people are under stress, the first part of tackling the problem of how to relieve stress is actually realizing that there is stress that needs to be relieved.
Stress Managment and Mastery: 6 Stress Busting Tips
In a hectic world, it's all too easy to reach the point of feeling stressed out beyond our ability to cope. Yet it's our ability to cope that makes all the difference. The point is that stress is not going to go away; it's here to stay.
Secrets to Aromatherapy II - Psychological Complaints
Aromatherapy is very therapeutic when it comes to healingemotional and psychological conditions. This is because theessential oils from plants contain all kinds of compounds,phytoestrogens and phytochemicals that have the ability tosubtly alter brain chemistry for the better.
Empathy - Anxiety & Panic
If you are an anxiety and panic sufferer, then you've probably taken a fast learning track of how many people around you actually suffer from this one skill "empathy".
Top 10 Tips on Managing Conflict, Emotional Tension, and Anger
To be a safe and predictable person for those around you at work and at home, it is essential that you are able to maintain your composure when you feel like your 'buttons' are being pushed. This strength will help you to achieve your goals in business as well as your goals for your personal relationships.
Using Exercise to Relieve Stress
Most people know of the importance of exercise as a means of weight loss, strength gains, and increased endurance, but exercise can play a major role in the reduction of stress. Along with just stress relief, exercise can help improve mental health, emotion and mood.
13 Stress Reducers & Profit Boosters
The United Nations declares workplace stress to bea worldwide epidemic. In the United States alone,forty-six percent of workers report that their jobis very stressful. This adds up to a million stressrelated workplace absences each day.
Every woman needs her own personal space for relaxation, not only to release us from the stress cycle but also to restore us so that we can reassume our responsibilities calmly and with deepened insight.
Over 35 Ways of Controlling Stress: Absolutely Necessary to Control Smoking and Weight!
* Play Romane's stress control seminar recordings, and read "The Wellness Journey". * Use deep breathing exercises. * Make an appointment for deep muscle massage. * Tense up all parts of your body one at a time and let go and relax. * Exercise with a brisk walk, hike, swim, bicycle, go to a gym or buy or rent your own equipment. * Use self-hypnosis. Lie down and relax your body step by step. Remember a peaceful place in detail, using all your senses. Really be there in your imagination. * Meditate: sit quietly, eyes closed. Slowly focus over and over on one word such as "calm", or "peace", or "relax".* Talk to a friend, counsellor, minister, or physician. Follow your physician's advice! * Change your diet: less salt, less sugar, less alcohol, less fat, less meat, less coffee; more fluids, fruits, vegetables, whole grain cereals, and fish. Enjoy a balanced meal plan for proper nutrition. * Listen to relaxing nature sound recordings, New Age or Classical music which induces slower, deeper breathing. * Drive to a peaceful park, forest, beach, mountain or meadow. * Take the day off or go on vacation. * Phone your local hospital to find out when the next stress reduction class will be held. * Start a new hobby such as painting, ceramics, sailing, tennis, yoga, etc. * Be assertive, not aggressive. Take a self-assertion course at a school or university. * Have a warm bath at 92 degrees F. with pleasant bath oil. * Drink chamomile tea. * See a foot reflexologist for better circulation. * Listen to a comedy recording; watch a live comedy show or video. * Stretch. * Volunteer to help others for diversion; new activities; new friends. What will you have given during your lifetime? * Change your daily routine, dress, route to work, furniture arrangement, etc. * Set up a regular time to relax, a "relaxation break" instead of a coffee break. * Change your attitude. Why does the same event bother some people, but not others? You don't always have to be right. You have a choice. * Avoid over-scheduling yourself for too many tasks. * Avoid "keeping up with the Joneses".* Make a daily "to do" list to tackle items in order of priority. * Don't spend $100 worth of energy for a 10-cent problem. * Break down a major task into several small tasks. * Delegate work to others. * Set realistic goals. * Give compliments and enjoy taking compliments. * Never say, "I can't do this or that". You get what you think about. * Make a list of tension reducers and things to do "to get outside of yourself".* Make your personal and family life a priority over other demands. * Balance work with play, proper diet, sleep, exercise and relaxation. * Be thankful for your comfortable bed, friends, food, water, a chance to work, freedom, and many other blessings!
Slow Down, You Move Too Fast
"Slow down, you move too fast, you've got to make the [moment] last!"
Canadian Physicians on Slippery Slope of Burnout
In a recent CMA survey of 2251 physicians, over 45% were found to be in an advanced state of burnout. If this reflects the seriousness of the problem in the general population of physicians in Canada, then it can safely be said that the healthcare system is at serious risk of collapse. In this article we outline our understanding of the reasons for this situation and propose a new approach to helping empower physicians. Additionally, we believe our model will empower their patients thereby reducing the burden on the healthcare system.
The Benefits of Eating from a Jar of Honey
June is the month of the honey moon. Custom holds that this is the best time to harvest honey from the hives. In some traditions, honey symbolizes love and fertility. During the first month of married life, newlywed couples were fed food and beverages containing honey to encourage love and fertility. Today, we honor this tradition in the name given to the "honeymoon" which is celebrated immediately after the wedding ceremony.
Stress Management: Are You a Workaholic - Humorous View
As we celebrate yet another Labor Day, I thought it might be useful to take a look at the place of work in our lives.
Have you ever said the words, "This job/my life is so stressful!" Or something else along those lines?
Let Go of Stress: Slow Down! Survive!
Don't wait to have a life-threatening disease to learn what I learned. When you think you'll die from cancer in six months you wonder why you've spent so much of your life rushing to get more done. At least I did. Let me explain: I grew up believing that I'd be loved, or not, because of what I did and that belief drove me to constantly try to please people.
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