What To Do With A 6 Year Old Smart Mouth Know It All

Just the other day, I was talking to some other stay at home moms and asked if they were struggling with any difficulties. "Yes," one piped up almost immediately, "discipline problems with my 6 year old smart mouthknow-it-all! I don't want to spank, and don't, but he seems to laugh at time out, privilage loss, etc. What do I do?"

Ahhh.. the joys of independence in children. I have found in working withchildren that when negative consequences are imposed (loss of privilages, timeouts, etc.), they simply do not work. My advice and what I try to do is toalways let the child have a choice in the matter at hand. For example: Your sixyear old (and any age for that matter) is not listening to you. You are askinghim/her to pick up their room. They are ignoring you and doing what they want todo. Instead of saying "if you don't listen there will be a consequence (timeout, loss of privilage, etc.) Try rephrasing and saying to your child, "Boys/orgirls that want to watch television later will have their room clean within thenext twenty minutes (or whatever time frame within reason for you). Make it apositive statement instead of a negative one. You can also use any type ofreward, it doesn't have to be t.v. privilages (a snack, time outside playing,phone time, game time, etc.)

This technique also allows your child to make a decision in their own fate. Ifthey choose to listen to you and clean their room, then they watch television. If they choose not to listen, then unfortunately they do not get to watchtelevision. Leave it simple. I know as a neat freak myself that to leave theroom messy for your child is HARD!! But simply say to your child, I am fine withyour decision not to clean your room, unfortunately, you also have made thedecision not to watch television also. The key here is to stay clam and positiveabout the decision that they have made and walk away.

Of course you are bound to have tears and comments coming your way about notletting the child watch television. Again, keep it simple, remind your childthat they did have a choice to clean their room and watch t.v. or to not cleantheir room and not watch t.v. Remind them that you love them and are fine withtheir choice. After a few times of making the wrong choice, children ultimatelywill start making the better choice for them. The key to your success with thisis to stay calm and positive.

Remember to always stay clam, and positive, no matter how hard it is!

Tammi Kauppinen is a proud stay at home mom with five wonderful children. After graduating from the University of Wisconsin - Whitewater with a degree in Special Education, she decided to find a way to stay home and raise her children. That hasn't kept her from working with kids! She has run an in-home day care for ten years, worked in variety of school districts with children with special needs, acted as a foster parent to teenage boys and as a respite provider for other foster children. She continues to work with children - including her own - on a daily basis and publishes a weekly email on stay at home mom tips. To sign up for this FREE service go to http://www.stayathomemominc.com